In the next couple of weeks, WhyGoSolo (and Tickets with a Twist) will both come offline. I’m not entirely sure when the end came…however, I do know it was before now; it just took me this long to admit it and come to terms with it.

I feel just as strongly and passionately about the concept/premise of WhyGoSolo and Tickets with a Twist as I did two years ago, but I currently don’t have the resources to pull it off; the most important resources being the money, drive and energy to revive it.  I made some attempts that all lead nowhere.

Two years ago, we were in pace with and in some respect ahead with development – now, we’re behind.  No matter what, the sites would have to come offline for a full facelift and I don’t have the developers or money for developers to revive the technology or to go mobile.

Two years ago I was in the buzz and part of creating buzz…now, I don’t really care.  I’m not done “playing” online by any stretch of the imagination, but my involvement will be different. The echo chamber got old real fast and I got hung up on things that really didn’t matter in the grand scheme of things.

I’m coming out of the last two years with baggage: exhaustion, guilt from letting people down, knowledge of mistakes I shouldn’t have made and a mountain of debt I’m still trying to pay off. I’m also still angry at some things that happened and things that didn’t pan out.

I can’t even begin to honestly describe how shitty having to write this post about pulling the plug on a dream and vision is like.  People who don’t dream big will never know what killing a dream feels like. This is my second time doing it and it’s much worst this time. I’m thoroughly humbled and awaken compared to where I used to be.

Now that the end is here, I want to close this chapter by acknowledging and sending thanks to all the people who at some point or another got involved in WhyGoSolo, all the developers, WhyGoSolo members, bloggers, DC Tech community, Pownce crew and all others who supported me and our efforts.

Above all, I want to acknowledge and thank Darcy Laycock and Michael Busselli who both really stuck through till the end – literally till the end; they will be the ones pulling the plug and purging the databases.

I wanted success for WhyGoSolo for Darcy and Michael more than I wanted it for myself – I was not able to deliver the grand vision they joined the team to realize and that is the HARDEST part of closing the sites down.

What’s Next?!?! (Four weeks later)

I was still extremely hurt and angry at the thought and need to shut down the sites, a month ago, when I wrote the first half of this post.  I still needed more time to accept what was inevitable.  Now, I’m in a much better place. I’m finally in a place where I can take what I’ve learned and apply it to something new under Yut Media Inc.  Although,   this time I’m going to avoid fighting the uphill battles that have always kicked my ass:

1. Entering a field/area that I have no background or contacts in
2. Being heavily reliant on technology and development to get started
3. Needing investors to succeed – Success makes getting investors a much simpler process
4. Stressing myself with unrealistic expectations and pressures
5. Starting a business that I think will eventually be fun. I’m starting something that will be enjoyable and fun from day one.

I’m in a good place with my life.  I don’t remember ever being this happy or satisfied with my present and the outlooks for the future.

I’m more relaxed, balanced, in-tuned, grateful and knowledgeable/cognitive of what needs to be done to meet my dreams than ever before.  I’m not pressuring myself and I feel I have already had a huge win in my life; realizing what happiness truly is and what it means to live life.

I have a wonderful life NOW. Turns out I didn’t need to realize my dreams to have a wonderful life; it was mine to have all along.  Having a wonderful life does not take away my burning desires to realize my potential/ambitions and build an empire to call my own.  However, now I get to do it and enjoy it a lot more.

Life is a journey, it really is. Life will show you everything you need to know about yourself and the keys to happiness, inner peace and being absolutely content.

You have to grow, act and change your thinking and circumstances for life to bring you the opportunities you’re looking for.  I left DC and moved to New Orleans.  I changed the way I did many things once I arrived to New Orleans – different behaviors and actions have brought me different results and outcomes!! I’m taking that new mindset into business along with everything else I’ve learned – lets see where that will lead me.

For some reason I thought the House of Blues had its start in New Orleans, but it did not. The first House of Blues was started in Cambridge, Massachusetts.

About the House of Blues (taken from the House of Blues website)

The House of Blues grew out of founder Isaac Tigrett’s love for the unique American art form known as the “the Blues”. Weaned on this music during his early childhood in Tennessee, one of Isaac’s goals was to introduce the world to the music of the rural south, including the Blues, Rhythm and Blues, Gospel, Jazz and Roots-abed Rock & Roll. The very first House of Blues opened its doors in a converted historical house in Cambridge, Massachusetts in 1992 and is home to live music, original folk art, and delta-inspired cuisine. The House of Blues is dedicated to educating and celebrating the history of Southern Culture and African American artistic contributions to music and art.

The House of Blues is without a doubt an interesting business case – established by to introduce “the music of the rural south, including the Blues, Rhythm and Blues, Gospel, Jazz and Roots-abed Rock & Roll” it had its start in the Northeast. What made Cambridge the perfect starting ground? Would the House of Blues be what it is today if it had started somewhere else?

I have not been to any other House of Blues locations, but I’m going to assume from what I’ve seen on the website that they all operate basically the same way, which makes the business simpler and easier to run. However, I do wonder if all the House of Blues venues are all ages venues. The one in New Orleans certainly is.

Financially I wonder if that’s more profitable or if the House of Blues takes a hit profit wise because of it? There’s no doubt that the crowd yesterday was mostly made up of teenagers. The acts were Jack’s Mannequin (headliner), Matt Nathanson and Erin McCarley. I hadn’t heard of any of them but those teenagers in the audience definitely had.

Teenagers are a huge consumer group – and from the lines at the products tables; they have no problems spending their allowances, parent’s money and hard earned money on products. Good for the artists but what about the House of Blues?

Because it’s an all age venue, no alcohol is sold in the music hall. Most venues make their money on the sale of alcohol…even those of years 21 and older could not bring in alcohol to the music hall purchased at the restaurant.

Tickets were $30 a person sold through Live Nation or the Box Office (note they don’t use Ticket Master…although with Ticket Master buying Live Nation if a moot point). There were 3 acts – I have no clue how much each act were paid to perform. I’m going to guest there were probably a couple hundred people in the crowd. In my head, no matter how you slice this pie; the profits can’t be much.

Since the audience was made up of mostly teenagers – it’s not like they were going to stop in the bar or restaurant to drink and eat afterwards and increase the potential of the profit margins.

I have to admit that the stage was well setup. The majority of the equipment for all three acts were all pre-staged. The transition from one act to another was rather expeditious and well executed…minimizing the need for a lot of stage hands.

I didn’t enjoy any of the acts. Wendy has seen Matt Nathanson ten times. She’s obviously a fan – he did not convert me into a fan. A few months ago I saw Lowry at a local bar in DC; I walked away with their CD in my hand. Some acts will create immediate fans while others will not.

I did get a kick out of watching the crowd/consumer group. Every time I looked down at the crowd someone was texting, taking pictures, or capturing a video. The crowd, like I said, was mostly compromised of teenagers and mostly of the female variation! I also spent the time analyzing the House of Blues operations, opportunities, functions etc. I do that everywhere I go. Observe everything, take notes…find the opportunities.

The upstairs area has a sitting area that’s corded off. Apparently that area is reserved for foundation members and donors, however; once the show started the guy running the area ran a side operation along with the bartender. Not entirely sure if this is a legit operation endorsed by the venue but the lowdown is that for the right “tip” you can find yourself sitting in the corded off area. Wendy paid a $20 tip for us to have seats. I love it – people will always find a way to make extra $$.

(Flickr 31 Dresses Experiment)

I’m so relieved I was able to have an idea again; I can’t really explain the joy I feel from it. I’ve been somewhat lost these last few months…an entrepreneur that can’t come up with new amazing idea is like a chicken that can’t lay an egg – I was starting to wonder if I had it in me; if I could even call myself an entrepreneur anymore. I was thinking may be I needed to go back to school and find something “fall back on”. Crazy talk.

My Quest for Life Balance

Since moving to New Orleans my life has been very different. I mean, I moved here to have a different life; I moved with the purpose of HAVING A LIFE. When I made the move here and turned a new leaf on 2009 – I made the conscious decision to add some life balance to the mix. Yes, I actually had/have to put a conscious effort into having a life. Instead of my business being my focus these last three months – I have been the focus, love/relationship and friendships have been more important and so as health and fitness.

Per my blog post on April 17^th , I set some different goals for myself but I knew they wouldn’t be enough – I didn’t write about this but I was going a little mad. I had a mental block that was driving me crazy.

Insanity Plea

Besides getting obsessed with working out (again); I was way too obsessed with wanting to be in a relationship. My frustrations with that area of my life quite frankly had left me…feeling way too much like a woman. It left me feeling needy, confused, wondering and slightly insecure. I spent entirely too much time reading into things, questioning my behavior, my needs, wants, desires and actions.

Sorry, but a man is not a healthy thing to focus on…particularly on a man not focused on me. That was NOT me. That was my mind having nothing to focus on.

My Mojo is Back!

I’m not going to shut the door on pursuing my fitness goals and my desire for a relationship…I’m also going to maintain my relationships with my new friends, plus the going out and having fun. However, now that mojo is back it’s back to business, baby!!

My identity, sanity, and happiness are tied to my ability to go forth and do entrepreneurial endeavors – the balancing act needs to revolve around that.

In August of 2007, I wrote a blog post called “Who is Your Front Man”. At the time I wrote the post, I was getting really involved in the web, or rather developing a web presence, since I imagined it would eventually pay off in assisting WhyGoSolo get off the ground.

Although I was enjoying being part of various communities; I wasn’t a fan of the popularity contests, and the small, yet loud echo chamber. Then somewhere down the road, I got into “social media” – I mean, you spend enough time online and learning the technology, plus attending events that it becomes second nature to understand how the web operates, reacts, grows and can be leveraged so I wanted to talk about that too. But how relevant was that to what I was initially trying to accomplish?

What I’ve just realized is that I’m actually a big fool that let herself get derailed. I started out wanting to develop and grow a web startup around a concept I strongly believe in and ended up…well, not entirely sure where I ended up. What I do know for sure now is that I don’t need to be known as a big shot social media guru. (Don’t get me wrong – I know my shit when it comes to social media strategizing but I don’t need to prove that to anyone) I also don’t care who in the social media sphere knows me or doesn’t…I frankly don’t like most of the self-horn-tooting-fools who are now calling themselves social media experts these days.

I was wrong about that post “Who is Your Front Man” because the truth is most of the CEOs of tech startups stay under the radar until their startup gets skylined. They network and conduct business with the players that are important to the success of their startup.

I feel like a dumbass for not realizing this sooner, it took taking part of a social media maketing plan brain storming session at SXSW and Dave Shaw telling me “You should do this for a living” to make me think “No, actually I don’t want to do this for a living. I want to develop and grow a business.”

I’m not going to beat myself up about it or the time invested and lost. I also won’t rush figuring out what to do with the Yut Media site and blog, but it will be changed at some point down the road…so will my follow list on Twitter.

That’s another point about being involved in social media…it takes critical time away from the business development (particularly in my case since I need to network with venues offline). My time online needs to be dedicated to doing research and finding the specific people I need to network with.

The social media sphere brought me a lot of aggravation and frustrations, it really should have dawn on me sooner that it just wasn’t the place for me. I’m fascinated with tech and I need to look at the web with those set of eyes.

I’m going to slap myself in the forehead a few more times before going to bed and start a fresh new beginning tomorrow morning with the title Web Startup Entrepreneur; the real brand I want to develop and reach success in.

I will continue to blog here and back on the WhyGoSolo Plug-in blog…where I need to attract new members.

WhyGoSolo turned 1 on January 5^th, 2009. It’s a hard pill to swallow to know the site has been live for a year and there’s been no real traction on it, yet. Tickets with a Twist was launched in August and nothing much has happened with it either, as of yet.

The move to New Orleans and getting another paying gig is to afford myself the opportunity to rewrite the business plan and shop it around for a seed round. I thought I would be able to do make things happen without a seed round, but I need to put a team together to be successful…and I need to be able to pay that team.

I feel better prepared to raise money, however; it’s a seriously tougher time to do it. Not only is it a tougher time to raise money…but evaluations for startups are down and thankfully I wasn’t thinking about a quick exit, because those are few nowadays and also much less profitable.

This is a good and shitty place to be. It’s a place where either things go to the next level or they come to an end. I rather it was the first and not the latter.

I don’t know how to describe this particular part of my entrepreneurial journey. What I know is that I have to continue to take steps forward…new steps based on things learned and walk in faith.

The next 6 months are going to be quite interesting. I have to walk in faith since I can’t even guess what twists and turns are in store. If I think about it…there’s just too much and I’ll drive myself crazy.

The plan is the rewrite the business plan in the next couple of weeks…keeping it simple, and straightforward. Once the plan is ready, I’ll leverage the contacts I’ve made the last couple of years to get it into the right hands and get prepared for the reactions.

Meanwhile, I’m going to keep things going with Yut Media, keep networking, blogging and exploring the web.

Stay tuned!! I’ll be reporting in what’s happening.

At any rate, what I won’t be telling my dad or what I’m in no rush to tell him, is that on November 1^st , I will no longer have a “secure” job.

My last day (for now) of wearing the Marine Corps uniform ends this Friday, October 31^st. I’m in no rush to tell him because I know he’ll start worrying.

Seriously, how many people give up a good, steady paycheck during a recession!?!? You know at least one – ME.

In May (six months ago) when I took a job back in the Marine Corps – all I had going on was WhyGoSolo. We were in a stalemate and things weren’t going so well. I was burned out on it, so I wasn’t able to be innovative and think of the best next actions to take. I was also under extreme financial stress.

Once I got some new footing under me – I was able to re-engage. We launched Tickets with a Twist and Yut Media, Inc. came alive!

The problem now is that only being able to work on Tickets with a Twist, Yut Media and WhyGoSolo 2-3 hours every other day is making me extremely unhappy. It’s not enough time to get the sites off the ground.

I told my boss a while back that I wouldn’t renew my orders pass October 31^st but I had initially lined up another billet for the month of November. However, that job fell through. At first, I was a wreck and I started worrying and stressing about what I would do. I got a hold of my fears and decided this was a sign.

A sign that it was time for me to give Yut Media a full time go – at least for a few weeks and see what happens.

Instead of 2-3 hours, I can give it 14-16 hours a day. I’m excited about it and I look forward to being back in the entrepreneurial life full time.

But here’s the biggest MUST DO in the next few weeks: MAKE MONEY. I’m being honest with myself…unless I can make money, I don’t have a business. These next few weeks are to test whether or not I really have a viable business.

Here’s how you play it: In order to achieve A you need B but in order to get B you first need A. So what comes first, A or B? The chicken or the egg?

It’s a very common game that investors engage entrepreneurs in. Here’s how they play it: In order to get blank amount of dollars; you must achieve milestones 1-3…meanwhile, you can’t achieve milestones 1-3 without the blank amount of dollars.

So what’s my current chicken and egg game??

It goes soemthing like this…

In order to entice venues to give Tickets with a Twist free tickets to upcoming shows they want to know I have a solid foundation of members (currently around 1,000 WhyGoSolo members). However, in order to appeal to a solid foundation of members I need a nice (good size and variety) selection of tickets.

What comes first…the venues (tickets) or the members?? Venues are attracted to the members and the members are attracted to what the venues have to offer.

How am I playing the game?

I’m going after the chicken and the egg at the same time:

1. I’m contacting venues and pitching them. I’m also reaching out to the actual entertainers and promoters for the venues who can also make things happen.
2. I’m working to rally members. I started the Facebook Group – We Only Go Out for Free to raise awareness about Tickets with a Twist and WhyGoSolo. Say we had 5,000 members in DC. That would make for a very appealing crowd to the DC venues…
3. I’m pulling my resources. I’m figuring out who knows who in the right communities to reach decision makers. I’ve bought quite a few people lunch this past week
4. I’m letting people know. I have the mission to aggressively let people know about Tickets with a Twist and the many win, Win, WIN situations it creates for venues, entertainers and people who love going out. I’ll continue to blog, engage others to blog, I’ve made videos, a squidoo lens, posted on Craigslist and will be attending many upcoming networking events and meetups to talk about Tickets with a Twist and hand out information. I’m also planning some other things through Yut Media, Inc.

I’m sharing this because if you’ve ever played the Chicken and Egg Game you know this is an extremely challenging game that drives you crazy and keeps you going in circles.

Am I nuts to blog about being in a Chicken and Egg Game…possibly, but people can’t help if they don’t know what’s going on!!

The last few weeks I’ve noticed just how extremely lonely I’ve been. Not the “I need a boyfriend” lonely. But rather, lonely in the sense that there is no one right now in my life with whom to share what I’m going through in order to get support and assistance.

That’s the only pitfall to not having a business partner…you find yourself all alone. Having a coach, will mean having someone who will listen to me once a week to talk through what I’m trying to accomplish, where I’m blocked, what struggles I’m wrestling through and what victories I’ve achieved.

I have a quasi support system, but I need a dedicated support system in place from someone who will intimately get to know my strengths and weaknesses, needs, desires and wants. Someone who, for an hour a week, will be solely focus on being there for me to assist me get to where I want to go.

Doesn’t hurt that I’ve been trained as a coach. I know the power of coaching and I’m ready to invest in it and put it to work for me.

If you’re reading this and you’re a coach or you know of an excellent coach – please have them contact me.

Again, I want a coach who works with entrepreneurs. Someone who understands the characteristics, needs and traits of entrepreneurs since that’s a good baseline to start understanding who I am and how I operate.

Oddly enough – that’s rapidly becoming my biggest quest again. I was working on the new investor deck yesterday and there was one huge glaring difference in the write-ups I was doing.

Last year, the money was needed mostly for development. We had a development team that was about to start development, but we had no product. Just a concept on paper.

This year, the seed round is needed to prove the concept in DC, VA and MD. The money is mostly for sales, marketing and PR.

Last year I was recruiting developers. This year I’m recruiting sales, marketing and PR people. It’s really awesome to actually have a product that’s ready to serve it’s intended purpose and make money.

I was unsuccessful last year raising money so ALL the development was done bootstrapping…and this time, although I think my odds are much greater to raise the seed round I need; I’m bracing and preparing to do all the marketing, sales and PR through a grass root approach. Even if we raise the money – a grass root approach will still be implemented.

A month or so ago Doug told me I’d have to “do my thing and get people to buy-in to my vision, again.” I sneered when he said that. I didn’t know if I had it in me to be able to do that again. Well, this last week has been completely rejuvenating!

I’ve been talking to a few marketing, sales and PR folks and I’m finding myself totally immersed back into the grand vision and plan. And just like I was blessed to find some amazing developers last year; I’m coming across some splendid marketing, sales and PR people right now.

Again, since we have a product now, when I talk to the marketing, sales and PR people the talk is about immediate action and implementation. Today, I’m brainstorming the initial marketing, sales and PR plan so I can properly assign tasks.

We’re picking up some entirely new momentum. I consider myself having been rather successful to date bootstrapping and taking on a grass root approach because of a strong vision, will to achieve, perseverance and hard work, oh and one other factor: Amazing People.

People are everything to the success of an organization. Most valuable resource = PEOPLE. That’s why I know that money or no money – we’re moving on the proof of concept.

Everything I read and everything I listen to is processed through my entrepreneurial filter. The entrepreneurial filter is like having extensive situational awareness while always wearing business goggles. I constantly seek what opportunities exist within what I just learned? What piece of information is relevant and what will I be able to leverage?

Sometimes it’s obvious and sometimes it’s not until a certain new prospect appears that makes the information I once heard become relevant. Everything you hear and learn has some sort of impact on business – somehow. That’s why anyone serious about business stays abreast of local, national and world news and happenings across all fronts. (Keep a forest view interest while you focus on whatever sector of the forest, tree or branch you’re on)

I think one of the most critical aspects of absorbing all information with the entrepreneurial filter is developing a great ability to think outside the box. My recommendation to anyone who is trying to raise money is “think outside the box”. Be it in regards to where, how and who of the fund raising process.

Someone contacted me today who wanted a little bit of guidance on fund raising. I replied to his question in a way that I know is frustrating to read because it didn’t necessarily have any clear guidance. I was annoyed with my own answer, which had me brewing on proper and helpful guidance for him. I hadn’t put in my email the usual “think outside the box” comment so I put myself in his shoes. Although I have little knowledge of what he’s working on; I started to think outside the box. It didn’t take but about 45 seconds for me to come up with a possible avenue for him to look into. This avenue is paved by a few things I’ve seen in articles and been hearing about on the radio.

He thought it was a great possible way to go. It’s going to take a lot of additional brainstorming to pave the road but at least it’s a real option with potential.

If you’re an entrepreneur or a striving entrepreneur start developing your entrepreneurial filter. Play around with what you hear and read about; find the business implications and possibilities. You can train yourself to start thinking any way you want to!! It just happens that some ways of thinking are a lot more beneficial than others.